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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
 Posted - 09/20/2007 : 21:22:42
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Beware of duty
“Should is an ordinary, everyday word -- except when it is used to
indicate an order that may not be refused. Then should becomes a finger
waving under the nose. …Should users build prison cells for themselves.
They are so focused on what they should do -- that they cannot think
about what they can do, what they might do in the future.”
-- Dr. Arthur Freeman and Rose Dewolf
Many of us have been taught to do our duty. What does this imply to
you? For me, ‘doing my duty’ means doing something I really don’t want to
do. My heart’s not in it, and so the energy for the act isn’t there. I
have to force every move. Usually, there’s underlying resentment. When
this is the scenario, tasks may get done but there’s no gift to the
world.
We do not truly serve the world if we give to others but neglect our
own truth and our own needs. It’s only when our own needs are fully met
that we can generously and whole-heartedly give of ourselves. It’s not
selfish to look after ourselves -- it’s essential!
“To serve is beautiful, but only if it is done with joy and a whole
heart.”
-- Pearl S. Buck
As my sponsor told me many years ago, "Examine your motive and your intent. Is it for the good of the whole?" Service and duty can become an addiction. I have a friend who volunteered for so many things she had no time for herself.
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Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 09/21/2007 : 22:36:05
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"We should be encouraged, not discouraged, by seeing how much
work we have to do on ourselves. It means we are awakening to
our actual condition, we are seeing our self-defeating attitudes.
People who live in self-images of being positive and wise and
pleasant see no need whatever to work on themselves, so they
remain in the suffering caused by living in dreamland.
The worse we see ourselves to be, the more encouraged we should be, for
if
you know all about darkness, you also know about dawn."
This reminds me of a time in early recovery saying to my friend that I didn't need to do a fourth Step because now that I was using there was nothing wrong with me. She proceeded to take my inventory for me. I went home and added to the list. Then I had to find the positive to balance it out.
Today I went out and bought a new crystal and meditaiton stone. Since I have found out about the problem with my X-Rays, I am trying to get back to a place of peace and serenity, by accepting where I am at and knowing that it can change and heal. |
Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 09/23/2007 : 10:36:17
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To support or not
"It is not helpful to help a friend by putting coins in his pockets
when he has got holes in his pockets."
-- Douglas Hurd
Are you struggling financially because you are helping another adult
who is being irresponsible around money?
Without intending to do so, we can keep people dependent when we are
willing to financially rescue them. Enablers typically feel it’s their
duty to help out. They may see giving money as an expression of love.
Unfortunately, they may lose their own financial security as a result.
As hard as it may be to do, the solution may lie in forcing the
dependent to find his or her own way financially. In this case, it’s not
selfish to not lend a hand -- it actually serves the highest interests of
all. Learning personal responsibility can be a tough road but it’s a
necessary one for empowerment.
"Few things help an individual more than to place responsibility upon
them and to let them know that you trust them."
-- Booker T. Washington
I love the word 'empowerment'. When I surrender to what is in the moment, I am empowered to do what I need to do for myself. The direction, the courage, the strength, and what ever I need is there if I am open to receive it.
Fear kept me stuck and sick for a long time. Learning to surrender, turn it over, and let go, allowed me to change that fear to faith.
I had to take charge of my own life. Look at what was good for me. Many times I have had to end relationships, move, change old patterns and behaviors. It all lead to healing. |
Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 09/25/2007 : 06:59:38
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Living the adventure
“I do not accept any absolute formulas for living. No preconceived code
can see ahead to everything that can happen in a man’s life. As we
live, we grow and our beliefs change. They must change. So I think we
should live with this constant discovery. We should be open to this
adventure in heightened awareness of living. We should stake our whole
existence on our willingness to explore and experience.”
-- Martin Buber
This reminds me of early recovery and becoming aware that everything wasn't black or white and that there were shaes of gray.
Everything isn't died in stone.
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Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 09/26/2007 : 07:26:54
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quote:
"Migrating birds are credited with the discovery of dozens of
islands in the Pacific Ocean, including Hawaii. Looking up at
a flight of birds, the observers reasoned, 'There must be a new
land in that direction.' That is what men and women need - the
sensing of a new direction, inspired by an upward gaze. "
It was by watching and listening to others who went before me that I found the Good Orderly Direction to heal and grow in recovery. I remember looking up as it is suggested here and a long-timer told me not to look up but to look within.
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Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 09/27/2007 : 06:31:10
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"SURPRISING DISCOVERY
Asked Arnold, 'How can we tell whether a teaching offered
to us rings true or not?'
'There is only one way. There must be at least a small part
within you that rings true. This part knows instantly whether
a teaching is true or false. Awaken this total intelligence.
Some day you may be surprised to discover that one small
part of you was right after all.'
'How can we awaken this new intelligence?'
'Do not live like most people. Most human beings want to blame
others for their troubles. Assume complete responsibility for
what happens to you until you understand the law of cause and
effect. An awakened person never causes trouble for himself.'"
This reminds me that what I put out I get back. What goes around comes around. I am in the moment as a result of choices made.
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Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 09/28/2007 : 08:38:17
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In confusion
“It is while trying to get everything straight in my head that I get
confused.”
-- Mary Virginia Micka
When I get confused, when my mind is wrestling with what to do, I have
learned to abandon my thought processes completely. The best solution,
I’ve discovered, lies in asking my heart for direction. This requires
that I stop my mental chatter, either by sitting in silence or by doing
something completely different. In quiet, still space, I often know
what’s needed, with a clarity I never get from the labouring of my mind.
And I now know, without doubt, that when I’m confused is never the time
to act. I must wait for clarity.
“I have never been lost, but I will admit to being confused for several weeks.”
-- Daniel Boone
For me, this is how I put Step Three into practice. It says to listen for the quiet in the 12 & 12. My mind never use to know the meaning of the word. It took a lot of practice to find that space.
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Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 09/30/2007 : 05:58:24
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Awareness
“Relative to the level of awareness that is possible for us, our
ordinary state of consciousness is as far from a direct experience of reality
as sleep is from waking consciousness.”
-- Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson
“The thought ‘I exist’ is not the same thing as the awareness of one’s
own existence. … Thought is not the same thing as consciousness.”
-- Jacob Needleman
A person asked Buddha:
“Are you a God?”
Buddha’s reply was
“No.”
“Are you an Angel?”
“No.”
“Then what are you?”
“I am Awake.”
-- Unknown Source
I like the thought of “The thought ‘I exist’ is not the same thing as the awareness of one’s own existence. … Thought is not the same thing as consciousness.” Going beyond the consciousness of God and being aware of His presence seems pretty awesome to me.
Knowing He is there and acting on it makes makes a lot of difference then just talking to Him.
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Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 10/02/2007 : 17:24:34
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Opening the heart
“Everything is made of light; everything is alive. The Great Mystery of
life has little to do with intelligence. The universe is not an
intellectual process. The intellect is helpful; but our hearts are the wiser
part of ourselves.”
-- Mellen-Thomas Benedict
Heart is a word that refers to many different levels of our being.
Essentially, it is the love aspect of soul, capable of making direct,
intuitive contact. Soul love is not emotional; it is highly impersonal and
intelligent, capable of grasping the essence of someone or something
without any projection on our part.
Appreciation significantly turns on the heart. Appreciation is not an
emotion that arises spontaneously, but a soul quality we can choose. The
more often we choose to be appreciative, the easier this choice
becomes and the more frequently our heart opens to give and receive love.
“If you open your heart, love opens your mind.”
-- Charles John Quarto
When it comes from the heart, you don't have to question your motive and intent, you know it comes from a place of goodness. |
Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 10/03/2007 : 01:46:11
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"What, exactly, is suffering?
Our pains are caused by our wrong viewpoints toward things. The
false self throws up an imaginary picture of how it insists things
should be. And every time this should be clashes with what actually
happens, we react painfully.
The problem is not what actually happens, but our demands that
something else should happen. Don't take my word for this; experiment for yourself."
This reminds me of what Osho says, "Greed is wanting to be other than where you are at." When I get needy, I get greedy. My drug of choice as always been more.
Emotional pain does come out physically. For me, stress is a big trigger for my fibromyalgia. |
Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 10/04/2007 : 05:30:29
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Inner critics
“We tell ourselves so many lies and half-truths ... We listen and are
duly impressed by these inner voices that turn into unseen judges that
nag at us. We give each of these judges a seat of honor in our minds,
all the while hating their guts and their never-ending supply of
judgements ... We give the judges permission to accompany us on each journey of
life, never daring to realize that we can park them, at least
momentarily.”
-- Eloise Ristad
“The Inner Critic makes each of us a child. As we become the child in
our relationships, we lose our sense of self. We are no longer
self-contained, self-respecting adults. We look to others for validation. Our
self-worth is based upon their opinion of us. Thus, everyone around us
becomes a mother or a father whose support and approval is desperately
needed to protect us from the constant criticism of the Inner Critic.”
-- Hal and Sidra Stone
I use to be my own worst critic. I always had to go outside of myself for validation and affirmation. Thanks to Al-Anon I no longer have to do that. That doesn't mean I still don't do it, but today I recognize it for what it is and then I can turn it over again! It was a great gift to know I no longer had to beat myself up and I didn't have to allow anyone else to do it either.
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Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 10/05/2007 : 06:42:16
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"Realize that ordinary thoughts cannot contact God. This explains
why past attempts to reach higher help have failed. Usual thought
is filled with egotism, which blocks contact. Contact comes with
a sincere and persistent request for contact. It is like a man in
a national park who wants to cross to the other side of a wide river
but sees no bridge. He asks a park ranger, who shows him the bridge.
Have an attitude that requests help. You will be shown the bridge to
a brighter land."
Not sure that I totally agree with this. For me, a thought is a prayer. If I have a positive thought, whether it is just a person's name comes to mind, for me, it sends goodness to that person. I believe I don't know what it being sent, but I always try to have an attitude of goodness for the greatest good for that person and the highest good for those around them. If I think positive, I send postive. If I think negative, I send negative. What ever I send comes back to me.
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Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 10/07/2007 : 07:43:25
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Giving choice
“Freedom of choice is more to be treasured than any possession earth
can give.”
-- David O. McKay
I want to choose the details of my life. Fortunately, I’ve come to
appreciate how important it is to give others the freedom to choose their
own paths.
None of us wants our choice robbed from us. I can’t know what’s best
for anyone but me. So why give unsolicited advice to others and expect
them to follow it?
“The truest characters of ignorance are vanity, and pride and
arrogance.”
-- Samuel Butler
“What man wants is simply independent choice, whatever that may cost
and wherever it may lead.”
-- Fyodor Dostoyevsky
This reminds me that all I have to do is carry the message. What someone else chooses to do with it is not up to me. I remember going to an AA meeting to speak. It was in our north end and I thought these people aren't going to identify with me. I wasn't a low bottom drunk. Then I got honest! I looked around the room and saw some familiar faces of people I knew from other meetings. I found myself saying, "Oh haven't seen him for a while, nice to see her again. What's the matter with you JoAnne, your a drunk just like the rest of them." A gentleman came up to me after the meeting and said, "I could really identify with what you said." I replied, "I don't know what I said, you tell me and we will both know." When I am spiritually connected, my HP does the talking and I am just a channel. I have been to speak at that group at least ten times. The drunk-a-log never changes, but the recovery does. I try not to dwell on what I did when I was drinking, I try to share my recovery. Everyone knows how to drink. What I have always needed to know was how to stop drinking and stay stopped. I generally tell them I am not here to do a 4th and 5th, I am here just to qualify. |
Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
Edited by - MajestyJo on 10/07/2007 07:44:27 |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 10/08/2007 : 09:15:58
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Wisdom
"...we need to abandon the idea that wisdom is knowing everything—the
whys, the wherefores, the how-tos. Wisdom is often more subtle, both far
simpler and exceedingly more complex. For wisdom requires the
discerning, the listening to, the acknowledgement of nudges and notions, of
senses and sensations, of the minute and what we often mistakenly assume
is the mundane. Wisdom means listening to the still, small voice, the
whisper that can be easily lost in the whirlwind of busyness,
expectations, and conventions of the world....”
-- Jean M. Blomquist
“Nine-tenths of wisdom is appreciation. Go find somebody’s hand and
squeeze it, while there’s time.”
-- Dale Dauten
“To finish the moment, to find the journey’s end in every step of the
road, to live the greatest number of good hours, is wisdom.”
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
My spiritual advisor told me that instead of 'beating/ myself up for not knowing, realize that when the time is right to know, I will know what to do. I use to forget a person's name and feel really bad about myself. How many times have you known a person's name as well as you know your own and not been able to remember. I was told I didn't know because it wasn't good for me or them to be drawn into that person's energy at the time for whatever reason.
The Serenity Prayer tells me I will know the wisdom to know the difference. If I don't then it is not time to act. |
Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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MajestyJo
Average Member
Canada
590 Posts |
Posted - 10/09/2007 : 12:14:55
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"The only human codes which are right are those based in universal
morals. For example, it is against human law to physically attack
another person. The man who does so, may or may not be caught and
punished by the court, but he is always punished on the spot by him-
self, whether aware of it or not. We may escape human laws, but never
the laws of our own nature."
Osho writes that spiritual laws transcend earthly laws. It helped me to heal old tapes and let go of the should have, could have, etc. |
Love Always,
Each Day is a New Beginning, so have a great one. |
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The Daily Guru - Spiritual Message
